#203 Time for Thinking

How would you benefit from a week isolated from the world? Theoretically it is something that everybody dreams about, but in reality, it is a little harder to put into action. It’s a habit that some very successful people have acquired and is actually what Leslie and Leslyn start this week’s discussion with. Starting with a clip about Bill Gates, Leslie and Leslyn discuss the benefits of a think week. The discussion continues covering issues with neglecting self-care and the need for improvements in solitude. There are many benefits for taking time for yourself to improve and Leslie and Leslyn challenge you, the listener, to do some more self-reflection!

In this episode, we discuss…

Introductions—Time for Thinking [0:01]

Show Intro [0:19]

Start of the Podcast [1:09]

Bill Gates Think Week [1:46]

Neglecting Self Care [6:50]

Alone Time [10:56]

Improvements in Solitude [15:45]

Share and Touch Base with Us! [16:53]

Back to the Episode [17:14]

Star Wars [18:21]

Too Much Alone Time? [24:21]

Think Week Suggestions [28:11]

Closing Points [32:25]

Try This at Home! [34:15]

Burning Question [35:54]

Episode Notes:

The episode starts out with a discussion of what a think week is and the benefits it can produce. Leslie shares a story, where her birthday present to her husband was to send him on a think week. Leslie got this idea from watching Netflix’s Bill Gates Documentary. A clip is played from the documentary where a think week is described. Melinda Gates, Bill’s wife, explains that a think week allows her husband to have time to slow down, write, and find the way that he wants lead. Bill Gates has been since the 90s spending a week alone, taking the time to read and think. He is said to absorb stacks of books and technical papers, anything that will help him understand the future clearer. Leslie gives this gift to her husband to allow him to go off and think deeply while she holds the fort down at home. This gave her husband an opportunity to think about his life not only professionally, but personally, as well as, time to brainstorm ideas as her husband is a tenured professor. This was the equivalent of a beach vacation for him and he was eternally grateful for the ability to do so.

To have personal, professional growth Leslyn explains, it is paramount to spend time alone. As she points out, you would think that Bill Gates probably has a stacked calendar and a full week of isolation seems like a huge commitment. It brings up the message that no matter how busy you are, always make time for self-reflection and self-improvement. Leslyn points out that the busier that we are, the more likely we are to neglect this self-care. We convince ourselves that we do not have the time to take care of ourselves. Leslyn gives a great analogy, no one would ever put dead batteries in a flashlight and expect it to shine. So why do we expect ourselves to shine, even when our batteries are dead?

Leslie mentions a quote that she read on social media stating that at the end of the day we are supposed to have nothing left. As she explains, this doesn’t seem correct. As again, using the battery analogy, if you are constantly draining a rechargeable battery every day, you will have less and less battery power over time. Leslyn adds that this kind of thinking is dangerous as it would reflect that the only recharge we have is sleep. This is not the case, as human existence has shown, sleep is part of our recharge but not everything. This advice to constantly be giving all the energy you have, everyday sets you up for failure going forward.

Alone time allows this recharge as well as giving you the chance to develop more compassion for someone who might not be a part of your regular group. Spending too much time with the same group of people can actually reduce the amount of empathy that you are able to apply to others.

This alone time doesn’t have to be a think week, it can be as simple as putting an hour into your day. Leslyn gives the example of going and sitting in your car during lunch. If it’s a bright sunny day, your car will naturally heat up and be filled with sunshine that over a lunch break will recharge you. Leslie’s alone time usually is spent at Starbucks where she is around people but is using that time to work on herself. In solitude, you are able to really solidify your ideas that were vague, and they become clearer. A lot of artist and writers do this as natural creators. It allows for someone to be more productive when there is no interruption.

Leslie raises the question, what other things get improved in alone time? Leslyn shares that empathy, creativity, and stress-relief can improve in time taken alone. Alone time reduces noise in our life, such as business activity and environmental simulation. These types of noises can cause stress. Getting away from that can help reduce your stress. It’s like going into a dark room when you have a migraine.

Leslyn goes on to say that being alone can help build your mental strengths. Although, as we’ve seen, connections are important, equally important is the ability to tolerate being alone. Research shows that being able to tolerate being alone leads to more happiness, better life satisfaction, and stress management. Strengthening the skills needed to be able to be alone increases your mental capacity.

This raises the question, is there too much alone time? Leslyn doesn’t believe that there is a finite answer to this, more like a sliding scale. There is a line, because everybody has different needs. It’s okay to be comfortable alone but be cautious of getting too comfortable and not making an effort to socialize. We, as humans, are social creatures that need to experience connection to stimulate and remind us that we are loved and not alone in this world. Being alone with yourself is not the same as being alone in the world. Leslyn says, if you start feeling alone in the world you know that you have spent too much time alone.

Leslie and Leslyn want you to get from this discussion that spending time alone can help you know yourself on a deeper level. The goal is to use this to think, which is a big focus of this podcast! Why are you who you are? The Try This at Home for this week is to try to take a look at what in your life would benefit from a think week, or think day, or even think hour. Make some time in your life at some point to spend time alone to ponder the deep, big questions about you and what you want to get out of the world. The burning question this week is why does a 7-inch pencil only have 5mm eraser?

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Links to Look At:

Inside Bill’s Brain: Decoding Bill Gates Trailer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCv29JKmHNY

Last Season’s episode on Self Care

https://www.trythisathomepodcast.com/podcasts-1/2019/2/12/self-care-first-aid

Cast Away Trailer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGuOZPwLayY